“There are neither beginnings or endings to the turning of the Wheel of Time. But it was a beginning.” -Robert Jordan
It seems so very peculiar to me that all these years have gone by, all of this time has past, all of these moments have happened, and yet I will always be straddled with the fact that I am left staring at the now inevitable ledge in front of me…. that inevitable ledge that has always been in front of me.
And for some reason I can not articulate, I have never focused on the ledge itself. I suppose it was because I was educated to do otherwise, and if you really want to know what I think about the history of western philosophical thought as a ‘formally trained philosopher’ and such (ha. silly piece of paper with a bunch of names on it.) it would be I am left Cynical and Nihilistic. But the world in which I walked…. oh the classics, those feet who have walked before me and left me footprints to tread, those great minds so far removed. I was asked to explore the brooding deep and dark underbelly of the great conversation, and came away a changed man. As Nietzsche put it most succinctly:
- “And if thou gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will also gaze into thee.”
And so it has.
For too many years now. I tell you my friends, I should be scared to look into the light much like a prisoner in Plato’s cave, for fear of blinding my eyes. I have been looking for so long and so hard into the abyss…. I forgot I had feet, or was at a ledge at all… or that there was and ‘I‘ in my head I called me. For so long I have doubted the very fundamental nature of my reality… without stopping to look at my feet. And the very ledge I stood on that allowed me such a vision.
I have been looking in the wrong direction.
- “Deep in the soul, below pain, below all the distraction of life, is a silence vast and grand – an infinite ocean of calm, which nothing can disturb…” – C. M. C.
Today I am starting with what I hope to be my own conversation, with the ‘I‘ that is the me in my head, with you, and with the very cosmos itself. For we are the same, you and I…. we are all of the dust of stars. Much as Carl Sagan said it:
- “The cosmos is within us. We are made of star-stuff. We are a way for the universe to know itself.”
The Universe is calling… I think it is time to know myself.